This is a commentary for those of you that often wonder about what it is like to find a date on the internet. I can honestly say, I wonder too. I am active on more sites than I really care to think about and the reality of it is that most people are shallow and are looking for nothing even close to a relationship. These sites tend to promote promiscuous shallowness. So why do it? Sadly, there are no bars I want to go to. Do they even have "mixers anymore? The churches in the area rarely, if ever, have anything for singles other than marriage advice and things for 30 and under. Us older kids have to fend for ourselves and wade through the trauma of internet rejection or worse, internet stalking.
So lets discuss what really happens in internet dating (at least to me). You create a profile. You add pictures and then you wait for someone to "like, wink, hint, message or view" your pictures. Then you put yourself through abject misery when none of the above happen, or worse, the only men that notice you are way too old to even consider, have no teeth, dressed in nasty clothes, extremely unattractive and/or are holding cigarettes or beer bottles outside their rotting trailer (yes they do post pictures like that).
I did mention shallowness, and while that is mainly what I think is the problem with internet dating, there is really no doubt that there has to be some chemistry and there is no way around people wanting to see what a person looks like. However, the way you can rig a picture these days, there is no guarantee that what you are seeing is really what you are getting. I am not kidding .... the majority of men that are on these sites are so completely ridiculous about the pictures they post. Sometimes I just flip through to crack up at the pictures. You think the Walmart videos are entertaining... just make a profile on a dating site and see what men post as profile pics.
Lets start with the pretenders or the men that think all women want is money. These men take pictures in front of a fancy car, on a boat, on a motorcycle, or on a beach. If they believe they can only persuade you to talk to them because they have money (or pretend to have money) they will take a picture in front of a big impressive house (usually one they don't own).
I especially love the guys that think taking a picture in their bathroom (that are usually super dirty and full of mess) is attractive. Guys, I can assure you, that the bathroom pictures are ridiculous and that is why the camera actually faces you for pictures!! It's called a selfie! Also, the pics in your bedroom or on the bed or couch or even a gym with your shirt off aren't really appealing either. Just because you like to look at pics of half dressed women, doesn't mean that is what I want to look at. If you have to show me a picture of your body, then that is advertising to me that you think a person's body is very important and also indicates that you are willing to do a lot more than I want to with a date.
If they are bald they wear hats, if they are fat you only get a head shot or no picture at all. If they are extremely unattractive they will hit on you with a psychotic frenzy. If they are extremely attractive, its definitely a scammer in Ethiopia trying to con you out of any money you have because they believe all women on internet sites are desperate, stupid or both.
Lets also discuss the men that completely ignore your very specific dos and don'ts. They ask inappropriate questions. Make inappropriate comments or just ask flat out your chest size and how much sex you like to have. They completely disregard my profile which clearly states I am a Christian seeking same! I finally figured out, since they all basically lie on their profiles, they just assume that I am lying too! Such a sad thing.
With all the shallowness aside, the most infuriating thing about the whole internet dating thing is that no one actually asks you out or rather no one you actually might want to go out with asks you out. My question is, why do decent guys with a good income go on the site and then send you a message and then never get back to you. I have guys that start conversations and they seem interesting and then they just stop. Not one date, not one complete sentence or complete conversation. It is ridiculous. I have yet to comprehend why they are on a dating site if you don't actually plan on asking someone OUT ON A DATE.
Let me also just add... stop putting on your profiles that you don't want "drama or games" AND THEN PLAY THEM. I have very cautiously given my phone number to one or two and have had some fairly good conversations via text (no one actually wants to hear your voice anymore even though they have the phone number). Then for no reason whatsoever, they just stop texting. Never to be heard from again. The ultimate game playing! These are the same guys that say they know what they want and don't play games. NO!!!! NO!!! NO!!! I truly am tired of high school nonsense.
So, to wrap up for tonight, dating is tough as it is, but internet dating is the worst possible nightmare for finding someone to spend the rest of your life with. Sadly, the alternatives are slim to none. EXCEPT I know my God is able and He can do more than I can ever imagine. So I will wait on him and focus on more worthwhile things, like bible study and spending time with my amazing kids. I might follow up on this another time, but I just got so irritated with all the nonsense and time wasted without one single meet and greet! UGH Good night all.
No comments:
Post a Comment