Memorial Day

Some friends of mine donated a pool to us.  What a kind and wonderful gift.  I am so grateful.

Last summer was difficult for me because my son was traumatized by our lack of ANYTHING to do in the back yard.  Imagination is a thing of the past and what used to be fun when I was growing up... like playing in dirt and using inside toys outside.... just doesn't cut it with
todays "high maintenance" generation.  Our next door neighbors (literally an inch from our driveway) have a pool, trampoline, swing set, yard toys, etc. and me... nadda.  So, needless to say, my son moped the entire summer because they had all this fun he was watching from the sidelines.  I had to spend an entire summer watching him longingly look over the fence.  It was excruciating!

He would ride his bike up the driveway and keep looking over at the other kids hoping they would invite him over.   Then I had to talk to him about not inviting himself over or seeking pity.... then I had to encourage him to find joy in what he has.  Not an easy thing when so much laughter was going on right next door.  It stunk for him, and it stunk for me.  It was a tough time.  I understood my neighbors have a lot of kids and a lot on their plate.  However to a then 8 year old, that was not easily grasped.  I got frustrated and sometimes really angry, but we survived the summer.

How quickly the winter came and went and all of the sudden next door was getting everything ready for the summer ahead.... PANIC  set in for me as I realized I still had NADDA for our back yard.  I was dreading yet another year of moping, sad days and mommy lectures about gratitude and finding something to do.  Then a miracle... one of the soccer parents who I had become friends with told me they had a pool they couldn't use... did i want it???? ARE YOU KIDDING ME????  That was a miracle from heaven!  Finally, I thought, no more longing looks over at the other house.  No more moping and whining about nothing to do.  I REJOICED and gratefully accepted this blessing.

I should have clearly reviewed the parent handbook prior to my rejoicing.  If I had reviewed said handbook, I would remember that whatever I believe to be a wonderful gift and present, ultimately will be another "no big deal" for the child.  Yep, that is the generation being raised.  Please do not think for one second that I don't discipline my kids.  I take things away.  I ground and I limit all kinds of things and still, this new breed of youth, has a thicker skin than any generation before!! Not even appropriately administered spankings work.

Why do I say this?  Well, yesterday the pool went up and we started filling it.  Friends were here, and everyone was running through the filling pool whooping with joy... TODAY my son has wandered aimlessly around like a lost puppy.  He has come in and out of the house about 50 times in a 4 hour period.  Gone through 3 pairs of shorts jumping in the pool getting out and going inside.  He has looked longingly over at the next door about 25 times!  ARE YOU KIDDING ME????  How on earth can he not find some joy in what he has???  I just don't get it, but then again, I am old and happy to just get a moment to sit outside unencumbered.

I am so upset at this moment that I am seriously considering just draining the pool and giving it back, except my daughter is grateful to have it and will enjoy floating around in a raft reading over the summer.  So what does this mom plan on doing... right now I am considering a bearing wall that goes 20 feet in the air to block the neighbors yard and some ear plugs for him so he doesn't hear the laughter!

God is good and the cavalry just arrived, FRIENDS... now everyone is in the pool and happy. Friends do make everything better...... peace at last...well sort of.... now they are all fighting over the hose ~sigh